They used to call me “America”

 I wanna be in Chile.  I really do.  I miss all my friends and family, I miss the culture, I miss the sights, I miss everything about it.  The aching feeling of not being there usually gets worse when I talk to one of my friends, which isn’t super often.  But yesterday, sparked by some boredom, I began searching through facebook and came across a group from the church that I used to attend when I was in Chile.  Low & behold, I found many (almost all) of my friends that I have longed to see ever since the day I last left Chile.  The friends I had in Chile meant more to me than I could even describe.  They made more of an impact on me than I think they will every realize.  It was the first time I every felt accepted by a group of friends; they made me feel like one of the crew, as if we had always been friends, like family.  The two summers I was able to spend with them were two of the most amazing summers ever.  I long for those days.  I have never felt so comfortable as I did when I was with them, not even back here in the states.  I get so nostalgic, and somewhat somber, when I think about those summers spent laughing, playing futbol, going to church together, having fun, innocent parties, walking the streets late at night and knowing we were safe…I felt comfortable there.  I felt like I belonged.  I felt loved & accepted.

So now that I’ve begun reconnected with them through facebook, I have become extremely happy, yet my heart longs to be there.  I got to talk with one of the girls, Ximena, for several minutes.  I hadn’t talked to her or heard from her really, since the last time I was there.  It felt soooo great to get to talk to her after so many years.  She got my hopes up though, because there is a chance that I could see them next summer, at an International SDA convention type of a thing in Wisconsin.  If that does work out, then I could spend the entire week with them!  If I had one wish, I would go to Santiago and seen them.

I really don’t wanna be here in Cali anymore.  There isn’t much I really wanna hold on to here; there are a few, but not a whole lot.  The few things I do wanna hold on to here are very special to me, and for those things, it would hurt to leave.  Don’t get me wrong, but as soon as I get the chance, I’m gone.  I would love to live in France for a year, but I would also love to spend some time in Chile and being with the ones that I love.  I’ve had great times here in Cali, especially these last few weeks, and most of all this last week post tour.  Friendships have changed, moments have been created, but all in all, life is going to be different with so many people graduated, and my own graduation in the near future.  All I can say is that I am extremely grateful for the (very) few friends that I know I can trust and for the all smiles, laughs, & hugs.  I just wanna be in Chile.

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~ by Chile on 27. May. 2008.

2 Responses to “They used to call me “America””

  1. How long were you in Chile and when?!

  2. I spent an entire summer “on my own” in Chile back in ’98. I stayed with my aunt and grandma, but I got to know kids my age who’s parents were friends with my parents.

    And then my whole family and I went back two summers later in 2000 and I was able to solidify some more of those friendships.

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